A nation mourns, but a family suffers

As yesterday’s events carried on throughout the day I sat at my desk, unable to work and uninterested in the small events going on around. Nothing against the great things happening in Drayton Valley, but something big was happening, something that many didn’t quite understand how it will impact the way things progressed over the day, but also over the days, weeks, months and possibly years to come.

After a day in the office, which started at 7 am due, I sat at my desk, receiving an alert on my phone about what had happened only a short time after I sat down and began to fill on reviews on boots I purchased online.

Over the next nearly 10 hours I worked and listened to what was happening in Ottawa, at first thinking of my father in law who will soon be based in Ottawa after serving at CFB Esquimalt, a Naval base in Victoria BC.

Messaging Ben I stated, “You mom is not going to like the idea of your dad going to Ottawa now.”

Later in the day after listening to the replay of information for hours, despite very little changing, I messaged Dan to let him know I was thinking of him and hoped things were as well as could be expected. In the natural good spirit of Dan, he replied “Kicking asses and taking names. Love Dad.”

The day carried on and more information came out and I continued to work and listen, when in a state of exhaustion I finally went home shortly before 5 pm.

Arriving home I tried to get the news on our smart TV, we don’t have cable, but decided I had already heard enough sad news for the day and carried on with things; Writing a blog about something that pissed me off, making dinner, taking a bath and enjoying several needed mugs of mulled cider.

When I finally sat down on the couch after my bath the words seemed to flow. I had earlier in the day contemplated on writing a blog about the day and the events that transpired, but I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t know what to write, I didn’t know what angle to approach it.

A tragedy occurred that day, people’s lives were changed in a way that can never be resolved, but sadly there will be a time when we all move on, and even more depressingly the reality this situation represents will all but disappear.

Writing this now I have not looked at the news since I have come home, I have tried not to think too much of it as to give myself some time to digest what went on.

As much as this day did impact Canada as a whole, I think more of the family that lost a loved one, a mother and father who lost a son, a little boy who lost his father.

Once the identification of the shooting victim was released my Facebook was inundated with pictures of Nathan Cirillo with dogs and RIP messages being sent out, despite the fact that those who are suffering most at this time will never receive them.

This attack, as well as the multiple other shootings that occurred in Ottawa, represents what some see as a shift in the way Canada sits within the world. For many, this was a wake-up call, a snap into reality for them to understand that as members of the global community we can be under attack.

Why people thought we were somehow safe in anything I can’t imagine. The United States is our biggest trading partners, we have had soldiers in countries of war, and we embody many of the cultural ideals that extremists, whether lone wolves or members of a bigger group, hate and wish to end.

This fact will be debated as we go into the future, and regardless of how the details of today work out the safety of our country will be turned into a topic of debate, a platform that will be used as a federal election looms in the not so distant future.

There have been theories the attacks are connected to Canada’s commitment to aid the fight against ISIL, there are accusations that this event is the fault of one individual and further accusations that it was a group despite the lack and/or presence of evidence.

As with any tragedy the trolls come out and a sad situation is used as proof or evidence as to why one group is wrong and another one is right, all while there is only one truth… a family is suffering.

Regardless what the government and Canada does, Cirillo’s immediate family, his friends, or his brother and sisters on the force, as well as all those who knew him have had their hearts broken, and all the pointless banter and detailed examinations of what happened and why aren’t doing anything to comfort them at this time, especially since for many it is just a small piece of a puzzle that will one day be disassembled put into a box.

Actions are the first tragedy in life, words are the second. Words are perhaps the worst. Words are merciless.
― Oscar Wilde


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